addicted to the PAIN…

Have you ever found yourself in an unhealthy cycle or pattern? Most of us can say yes to that question. Sometimes, we become accustomed to pain and dysfunction. It is easy for survivors of abuse to fall prey to unhealthy and toxic behaviors or relationships. I found myself in a highly unhealthy relationship with a toxic person. I was so confused and did not understand why I kept allowing this person access to my life. 

One day, I realized I was trying to win their approval, like I tried to convince my father that I was worthy of his love. I learned a valuable lesson. I kept entertaining this relationship because the disrespect I allowed was familiar, and although it was distressing, it was all I had ever known. Mistreatment was my norm; despair had become my protection. If I were not experiencing relational pain, I would panic. I became addicted to abuse, and this person consistently gave me my fix.  

The pattern continued until I was ready to face my dysfunction. Like all people with an addiction, I would vow that it was over, and I would try my best to move forward. Nevertheless, the withdrawals dominated me, and I would end up back in the same cycle. 

I had to take responsibility for my life and stop allowing myself to be broken into a million pieces. We are not responsible for the trauma, but we are responsible for our healing. In order to heal, we cannot see ourselves as victims because we are overcomers, and we are much stronger than we presume. 

Allow God to reveal the root of your brokenness and walk away from unhealthy relationships. Make room for divine connections; you will not be sorry.